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Perception


When I was a small child I became obsessed with my older brother’s record collection (yes, he is that much older ;))

My favorite band was ‘The Doors’. Although it was straight out of my parents' generation it had a gorgeous lead singer and lyrics that just called to me, even if I barely understood them.

I remember being fascinated with the band’s name and the significance behind it. Which in turn lead me to discover William Blake, the poet. It was in fact one of Blake’s famous passage from the Marriage of Heaven and Hell that inspired the band to call themselves “The Doors’.


Being only 12 at the time I had absolutely no idea what any of that meant and yet something inside me resonated with it.

More than 20 years would pass though before I truly understood what Blake meant.


Before my veil was lifted.

Before my life changed forever.


It all started by my mom’s dog biting me one day. It was a pretty nasty, messy bite and needles to say extremely traumatic. To this day I swear the trauma did something to me. It shook me out of my tranquil blind existence showing me that all things happen for a reason and we are a lot more than just our physical body.

The second step in my journey came in the form of a single misplaced book in my mom’s bookcase. It was a book about ancient traditions, spiritual paths and esoteric teachings. Just like with the records years before, I didn’t understand much of it but at the same time it left me wanting more. I started looking for more books, clues, teachers. I was starving for knowledge and answers. I was really trying to understand if what we see it’s just an illusion and if we can see past it. But I could only get so far. Yoga, meditation, spiritual leaders, they all helped me immensely but I could never push myself far enough. Always close but never quite there.


And that’s when I came across the subject of plant medicine. After researching for one year, I came to the conclusion that Ayahuasca was going to be the next step in my search.

Ayahuasca has been used for both medical and spiritual reasons amongst the Amazonian tribes for millennia. It is a brew obtained from mixing the leaves of the Psychotria viridis plant and the stalks of the Banisteriopsis caapi vine.

It’s name comes from the Quechua language’s aya with means soul (or ancestors) and wasca (huasca) with means vine or rope. Literally 'Vine of the Soul'.

So there I was, on a plane heading to Costa Rica for a week excited to partake in my first Ayahuasca ceremony.

What happened during that week changed my life.


And I am not talking about the things I saw, felt or experienced during the ceremonies because I know that skeptical people would tell you that those were mere side effects of being high on a strong hallucinogenic substance.

No - it’s what it did to my brain that I will forever be grateful for.


It rewired me.

It lifted the veil and opened those doors. It changed they way I thought and experienced life.

Did I notice right away? No. It took a series of tumultuous events in my life after I returned home to truly make me realize how different the way I looked at the world was.

I started to really see people, see through them, through their masks and barriers, I started to attract others like me and truly connect with them.

I found the source of my fears and anxiety and realized there were not even my own which then enabled me to freeing myself from their burden.

I started to truly live.

Is plant medicine the only way to achieve that? Absolutely not! Meditation, breath work, yoga, they can all get you there if you practice with enough dedication and the right intention.

Plant medicine was just my way. And although it seems like a shortcut, an easy way to reach the goal of awareness, I can assure you it’s probably the hardest option since the events that tend to follow the ceremonies are often extremely intense. If you are not mentally ready for them or able to understand what’s happening and why, it can lead you to utter chaos.

I know because that’s how I felt in the beginning. I felt as I took on a lot more than I bargained for. I was completely unprepared for what hit me.

But at that point it was too late to go back so I just had no choice but to truly trust the process.

Blind trust. It was possibly the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

But eventually I was able to see through the chaos and accept the test and challenges as the necessary steps to upgrade to a better, awaken version of myself.


What sadden me is that substances like alcohol which causes so many deaths each years and literally kills your brain cells (not to mention being a well known depressant) is widely accepted and even encouraged (together with prescription meds), while other substances like ayahuasca, mushrooms and even cannabis are still illegal in so many countries.


Nature as always provided us with tools for our wellbeing, both physical and mental, we just need to be willing and mature enough to accept the help and most important embrace the journey they will lead us on.


It's time to open the doors…


* If I wasn’t clear enough though, plant medicine is to be used as such - a medicine. And just like you wouldn’t be taking antibiotics every week, neither should be plant medicines used lightly. It should be approached with the most utter respect as you are opening and exposing yourself to something very powerful and extreme caution should be taken. The people you share these experiences with, will have an impact on your experience and existence. And the person guiding you through the experience should be someone you trust and capable of handling the medicine and the world it opens you to. So choose wisely.

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